18 Comments
User's avatar
Penelope Wright's avatar

The fireflies sound amazing, but the best part of this is hearing that your heart is starting to open up again. Seeing you write that you are feeling that warmth again, is a big deal.

I'm really glad you had this moment. 💕

Nikki Meyler Miller's avatar

Thank you for your kind comment, Penelope. It's funny how unexpected and thrilling it was at the time. I am back in Tennessee today, promised a venture out tonight with my son and grandson, to see fireflies for the second time! I'm still excited by them and hope to catch a few tonight!

Lynn J. Broderick's avatar

So beautiful, Nikki. My heart goes out to you.

Nikki Meyler Miller's avatar

Thank you, Lynn.

Davina | Belonging to Myself's avatar

Yes. That is my experience too. That beneath the addiction is great tenderness and sensitivity. The drug is the blanket of protection.

Joanie Madsen's avatar

I so agree about the open hearts found within the rooms of 12 step. An elixir to witness. When our laughter returns… for me it was when I could remember the antics of Douglas. Always a trickster, with saying and doing the funniest things! Those family jokes that live on.

Beautiful, Nikki, and always my gratitude. Xo💛

Nikki Meyler Miller's avatar

Oh, the memories are wonderful. Garrett made me laugh every day! Garrett and Douglas both give us belly laughs, still! 💜

Kate Smedley's avatar

This is so tenderly written and from the heart Nikki. Your words about the emotional muscles clamping around the heart perfectly capture how grief feels, but the glimpse of hope in the fireflies is magical.

Nikki Meyler Miller's avatar

Thank you, Kate. It really did feel magical, and unexpected. It caught me off guard, which is probably why I was able to laugh.

Mary Jo Curtis's avatar

Such a beautiful piece, Nikki. Thank you for sharing your heart.

Nikki Meyler Miller's avatar

You are so welcome, Mary Jo! As always, thank you for your feedback.

Lyssa Reese's avatar

Nikki, this is so beautiful! And astonishing to believe you could write it mere months after Garrett passed. When I was in college, I had the privilege of being cast in a one-act play called “Where have all the fireflies gone?“ I fell madly in love, and that entire semester was truly magical. I’ve always believed, fireflies carry messages from beyond the veil.

Nikki Meyler Miller's avatar

Laughing, I couldn’t help myself, while being astonished I was capable.

Thanks, Lyssa, for sharing your story, and it felt beyond the veil.

Pam McCarty's avatar

It’s hard to keep love away. I love your encounter that brought it back to the surface. Who knew? Fireflies are magical.

Nikki Meyler Miller's avatar

Who knew, indeed! An unexpected portal.

Pam McCarty's avatar

Yes nature speaks and we listen.

Dakota Miller's avatar

Love is all that matters in this world. The only thing that prevails through all. I love that you're feeling love again. You deserve it.

Nikki Meyler Miller's avatar

You were there! It was the park where we played pickleball, and then the motorcycle ride afterward! My first experience with them! I'll never forget it.